last orders

pulling pints or partners

at the local after work

where folks speak freely -

this is what saves some of us

wapentake - an assembly or meeting place, 

at a crossroads or near a river, one's vote 

was taken by a show of weapons

in the pub, chat through the feast we enjoyed

hypothesise how to remake nearly-michelin-starred

courses in our own kitchens - beetroot bbq sauce,

the power of rabbit, eel, tarragon and dashi

japanese broth - simmer and slurp

take things out of the sea

taking the sea out of them

there’s poverty here -

the poor drink small beer

eat seaweed and leftovers

buy each other drinks based

on who got paid most recently

the 1854 cholera outbreak - doctor snow 

realises those who don’t get sick are drinking 

so much beer that they aren’t drinking water

for the smiths beer was water

reached for first to quench thirst,

barely recognised for the buzz

it brings, a kiss in comparison

to opioid bee stings.

hogarth’s beer street and gin lane, 1751 - 

contrasted the health and productivity benefits 

of drinking beer with the vice of gin drinking 

at seven years old, I learn drinking

isn’t all it’s cracked up to be - 

daddy’s handprint painted red 

across mummy’s cheek

head quickly swells with stout’s firm body

texas gold fills the glass - drink this 

medicine, wash away the taste of defeat

sit alone in the corner of the bar

head down, stare into the murk

left where spilled beer coalesces 

mouth like gunfire until leon notices, 

brings you into the cheer of idle chatter

You don't become a regular until you have

drunk in the same pub for at least 10 years,

spending over 1/3 of your income throughout.

being a regular is its own brand of joy

fresh pint sat waiting when you arrive

the in-joke and smile shared with the girl

behind the bar - yeah, we’re the same

more than 80% of women said yes, 

they had experienced sexual harassment 

while working in a pub or bar

this one grabs your tits, grins and gurns,

you raise your fist, a clear shot to the eye, 

red and black once you pull back

one in four britons will meet 

their future marriage partner 

in the arms of a local pub

this one’s tall, dark, and surly

but he knows your drink order

and three summers later you make 

your vows on bow bridge in central park

the blood-lust of goddess sekhmet sated

only by red beer she mistook for blood - suddenly 

so drunk she gives up the slaughter altogether

three swords, baby faced assassin,

cannonball, heart and soul, transmission, 

raspberry summer shock of sam smith’s

and they asked me in to dinner, 

to get the beauty of it hot—

HURRY UP PLEASE IT’S TIME

HURRY UP PLEASE IT’S TIME

goonight bill. goonight lou. goonight may. 

goonight. ta ta. goonight. goonight.

LAST ORDERS AT THE BAR PLEASE!

we spill out, laughing, into blustery snow

wrapped in warm light and old jokes, 

new number on a napkin in your pocket.